Tuesday, 30 June 2009
{ 4:33 pm }
HEADACHE MUCH??i couldnt sleep yesterday. i slept around 3-4am? had alot in my mind. i kept thinking, what was i doing? am i doing the right thing? is this supposed to happened? i wonder. i think. very hard. i dont know what i did. but i really guess that its good for her. anyway, i ended up waking up late. i woke up at 7am. i get ready and all that till 7.30. and i knew i was gonna be late. had to rush so i took the cab instead. $5.10!OMG! school is damn near but the price is seriously ergh! i thought the driver was cheating on me. but what the heck. i just paid him coz i was more worried i would be late than getting cheated. lol. so luckily i was 5 minutes early before school begins.
first lesson is elective geography. omg! what a boring start of the day. luckily there wasnt a re-exam. its extended to next week. hmm. have to study liao. Mr. Tan was very caring. i realise that now. he may be an angry beast sometimes but he shows me that he really cared about our future and studies. i mean all teacher does but differently. we didnt study much. we went through all the diaghram for rivers and coast platform. interesting but a bit boring coz we already had went through them.
after that we had MT. mother tongue was ok. we were introduce with the new teacher. darn, i forgot her name. she's sweet. i think. but mdm fazila took over for today, the new teacher observe how mdm fazila teach and how well we behave. ^^! we played a game. some how like the game cherrade. is it spelled like that? ohk whatever. but its a malay version. it was fun! there were once when Kartika was acting the word and the rest had to guess and i was one of them. then ther word was "JuruSusila" i think. then she was like "JURU, KAWAN KAU!! KAWAN KAU!" she yelled it at my face. and it was so funny. and i was like, "JURUHAIKAL?!, JURUHIRZI?!, JURUFIRDAUS?!." then finally muhaimin said JURUSUSILA. haha.. it was so intense yet so funny! lol.. it was fun..
we had pe after that. took our height and weight. WEEEE! i grew 2cm tall and i lose 2 kg.. i think not sure. lol.. after that, boring. we also have new pe teacher. a trainee. mr.lo. he's nice.. i think he's funny. he looks funny.
recess, didnt eat as usual. lazy to line up.
maths was next. for this semester, we gonna learn about graphs. quadric equations and stuff like that. hmm, its gonna be a hell of semester man. :D
english next. ms sim read out our introduction card we made about what we like, what we want to be and all other stuff. we made that yesterday. lol. olright!
last subject was art. mr.lo went on about what we gonna do this semester. urm, after that, we had to draw. an upside down picture. it was crap. it suppose to test our right part of our brain or something. i passed. that's what mr.lo said. but whatever. after that we had PC. alright kot. talk about H1N1 stuff again. i didnt listen much coz i was distracted by thoughts. bout her. bout those whose infected by H1N1. bout lots of stuff. i dunnoe which to start. my head was spinning and i almost like want to faint uh. after that i went straight home!sigh!
i dont know what im doing. im always like this. try to be a hero but then destroy myself. i let other people happy but myself in distressed, anger and upset. for what? i also dunnoe. maybe because seeing those around me happy, ill be happy. i guess. i really dont have that strength lor k. ergh. i hope what im doing wont regret for the rest of my life.
Monday, 29 June 2009
{ 7:12 pm }
first day of school..
it was fun but it would be better if putri and hirzi were there.
so there were new changes. we were introduce to two teachers.
one unknown which is my mother tongue teacher and the other is my english teacher, Ms.Sim.
i think she's nice.. I think!so yea.
we had a lot of new faces, new hairstyle and new everything about the students.
the shitty part is that we had to take temperature la kan. two times a day. cen de ma fan de lei!
i dont know if i spelt it correctly. lol. but you know what i mean.
we slacked all the way, making jokes and laughing our ass off. think that's all about school.
i slept la kan after i get back home. i dunnoe, i seldom slept after i come back from school but today i was really tired and dizzy. so yea, pfft. i just wake up here anw.
balqis, i dunnoe what you want from me but i know you're acting to hate me and ignore me and stuff. lol. and whatever la kan. i know you miss me. and i really miss you. can you like text me soon? read this than text me. im bored and like i need to tell you something really important. really really really important. i hope you know what i mean kankankan?? lol. anw, i miss you loads! you text me last night but i was asleep. you said something like 'to have what we want is to strive to what we dont want' urm, ok?? lol.. the you said ' fear of losing someone is the positive of getting someone'. you know when i read this i have no clue to what you're trying to say. its like im reading some riddles that doesnt mean a thing. lol. but ill figure it out. somehow.:D LOL. bye!
Sunday, 28 June 2009
{ 10:25 pm }
hey, this is a conversation which i had with "angry Balqis". :D
me: hey baby, still angry?
balqis: since when did you care?
me: oh cmon, it was what? 3-4 days ago?
balqis: so?
me: its few days ago, i already said im sorry.
balqis: sorry doesnt solve anything.
me: ok?, tell me what i shud do?
balqis: hmm, (thinking) could you jump off the roof?
me: (laughing) dont worry about that, im pretty sure ill be gone by......
balqis: SYAFIQQ!!!!
me: Ooops..(grined)
balqis: i really hate you saying that.
me: i dont hate you.
balqis:giggles a bit) Shut up!
me: haha, at least you're laughing.
balqis: dont ever say anything like that again!
me: awww, so sweet. sayang jugak.
balqis: mesti la.
me:haha. so you're not mad?
balqis: ill forgive but not forget!
me: yadayadayada. you will. hahah.
balqis: bluek!
that's all folks!
Saturday, 27 June 2009
{ 9:39 pm }
PUTRI"S BACK FROM OVERSEAS
haha. ive missed her hell. she called me few minutes ago. as soon as she landed to singapore. so happy liao. glad that she was safe. but too bad ill be able to see her in a weeks time. she's under quarantine. haha. too bad lor. meet you soon sis! lurb ya!
:DD
{ 7:13 pm }
I guess you never fell in loveI guess it wasn't strong enoughI guess I could've been a better manI guess it wasn't worth a second chanceI wish I never fell in loveCause maybe then it wouldnt hurt so muchEven though you really broke my heartI would do it all again
Friday, 26 June 2009
{ 4:06 pm }
Babe you leave me confused
Dont know if I
should let you know or wait it out girl
Wish I knew just what to do
Im so confused
Thursday, 25 June 2009
{ 8:12 pm }
This Song Is Stuck In my Head. Oh aku hanya ingin kau tahu
besarnya cintaku
tingginya khayalku bersamamu
tuk lalui, untuk yang tersiksa kini
disetiap hariku.
disisa akhir nafas hidupku.
this song has been running through my head in whatever im doing. WHY? hmm.
{ 7:16 pm }
I SWEAR I LOVE BALQIS ALOT!you are really someone who knows how to make a guy smiles even though how heartbroken they are! omg, i didnt realize that until few minutes ago. lol.
i talked to her on the phone for awhile. she really makes me laugh. hard! and no girl has really been able to do that except for Aidah and Balqis. she made jokes of every sentence i said. she knew i was upset about something. i told her everything and at first she was quite maybe because she is trying to think of some way to make me laugh rather than moaning. she cheered me up instantly. haha. thank you for listening to my crap yea qis. if only you are just not my far cousin. actually i can date you coz you are my father cousin's son's daughter. so we are somehow related but not related. haha.. ok im talking bullshit. but whatever it is, i love you.
yesterday was awesome guys! i watched TRANSFORMERS 2 awesome guys! at causeway! a MUST watch MOVIE! went with all my family. grandma, cuzzins, pakciks and makciks are all there. it was enjoyable. the show is funny, sad, romantic and actions at the same time! awesome la seh. ill watch again if i must! woohoo! MEGAN FOX IS HOT!
i think that's it i guess, we go our seperate ways? so much for not leaving each other huh? sigh. goodbye then.
Wednesday, 24 June 2009
{ 12:13 am }
All You Had To Do, Was Apologize. And Mean It.But you didnt say you're sorry.
i dont understand, you dont care that you've hurt me.
and now im halve the man that i used to be.
when it was you and me.
you didnt care for me enough.
My heart may never mend.
and you'll never get to contact me.
Again... D:p.s: to those who gonna comfort me or whatever after reading this, i really appreciate it. i really2 do. but im ok. :). so guys dont worry. ;D
Monday, 22 June 2009
{ 11:23 am }
WHAT A SAD MORNINGthis is personal. so readers, read this.
close friends. trust. lie. its really sad that that certain people treat me like im some kind of liar. i know that i always joke around and that can be fiction most of the time but i dont lie about serious stuff and what more to a close friend. i know that some of my friends dont trust me that much coz they thought that i was kidding around. but when i dont kid around, its the truth.
'she' thought i didnt had work on saturday and sunday. which was yesterday and last saturday. i told 'her' that ill be texting 'her' on monday which is today. but i online yesterday and 'she' went online, i think coz i didnt know. and i had enough of using the com and sign out. i check few of my accounts and shut down the com. i was at home back then. i ended early anw. at 8pm? or later. cant remember. so we all went home. i was already dead tired but i was desperate to check my emails and stuff.
it broke my heart instantly knowing that 'she' dont trust me. 'she' is just like the others. i thought 'she' would be different. but i thought wrong. i thought today would be a fine day coz i can relex finally from all the work i had. but this spoils everything. 'she said i was trying to avoid 'her'. why would i avoid 'her' anyway? 'she' said i lied to 'her' and stuff. i cant tell you reader coz it really hurting me telling all these. it is just hurting me so bad. i feel like, like. hais. i dont know.
maybe, just maybe...
'she' is just like others. im so dissapointed and hopeless right now. i dont know what to think or do. my heart is breaking into pieces and my brain thinks alot. D: i feel destroyed. :(.
bye!
Sunday, 21 June 2009
{ 9:29 pm }
I Am Back From Torture People!just got back from rewang. omg. just 2 days and i feel as though i have work for like 2 weeks.. honestly, i was feeling terrible, nausea and pain. lol. but i think its all worth it. well, my gaji havent get yet. but its ok. i can wait. most probably, tomoro. lol. honestly speaking, i extreme overly work. my back is killing me, my head is spinning. every muscle and bones in my body is weak. my fingers also. lol. im saying "ouch" everytime i type. haha not. wow, i cant believe i miss her. i dont even know her uh. but she was there when i was kendarat-ing. lol. she always look at me. or i think she does. talked to her ONCE ONLY! WTH! lol. this is what we said;
me: (carrying pail of water, accidentaly hit her slightly) omg! i am so sorrrryyyy.
her: ehk tkpa :)
me: sorry eh, its really heavy and i lost my balance. anw, hi.
her: hi. u kendarat here is it?
me: kind of uh. coz my cuzzins are like doing two jobs at once. washing the plates and kendarat.
her: oh not tired meh?
me: you have no idea. i think im gonna have muscle like arnold schwarzenegger. haha. no la. im lame. sorry.
her: haha, ape je tau.
me: ape nye?
her: haha
ibu liza(my aunt): OI SYAFIQ, dun flirt around la.. ishk2. go pour the water in the basin. the people need to drink la!
me:(ashamed) alright then, i gtg. urm. ill talk to you soon?
her: haha. your aunt is fierce. haha. alright. come find me.
me: that'll be easy. ;)
her: haha. anw, i dont get your name.
me: syafiq. HELLO!
her: lol. im Fasha.
me: full name? haha
her: for you to find out! haha.
me: aww..
ibu liza: SYAFIQ!!!!
me: (rushing) BYE!! haha.
her: bye!
p.s: we talked in malay language btw but i translate it.:DD
well, that's it. and guess what?! i didnt get her freaking number people! and now i have no idea where she is right now.lol. aww tough luck. but oh well. if we fated, we'll meet. :D. i hope ;(! lol.
ouh yea, i forgot that firdaus parents came by. i was shocked and whoah! i didnt approach them coz i was freaking scared of them. i dunnoe why. they look scary. LOL. k no offence. hmm.
k la i think that's all. penat woit!
im sorry for doing this but i dont think i can have any contact with you ever again coz its tearing up my heart when im with you. but when we are apart i feel it too. and no matter what i do, i feel the same. with or without you. im sorry, if i hurt you, my dear. i really want to try to understand you. so that you be smiling all the time. ill miss you but its a must. take care.
Thursday, 18 June 2009
{ 11:59 am }
THE TIME OF MY LIFE
Wednesday, 17 June 2009
{ 11:07 pm }
I can Forgive baby, but i cant forget:(wow.. i miss sulas sia.. haha.. jom sulas, kita "jogging" lagi?? anyway, balqis called me just now, crying! ergh, hate it when it happened. she said something about her parents fighting over money.. sheesh wth. over money? cmon uh, people are suffering and they are fighting over money.. grow up la pls! balqis ends up the victim of all your anger? pls be reasonable.. anw, balqis is alright now.. with me around, she smiles one! that's what she said people. i didnt made that up! so dun accused me of being arragont or whatsoever..hee..
k la, i have nothing much to say only that im bored! lol.
Tuesday, 16 June 2009
{ 1:43 pm }
Fear of actually losing someone dearest to you is really awful.
i felt really devastated knowing that im gonna lose someone loving, caring, sweet, cute, funny and adorable.
first and far most i would like to thank you for accompanying me in my boring life.
and was there when no other people were.
being with you will be the one i would cherish most.
thanks for understanding my every problems and weaknesses.
i think you are the only one that knows my real weakness in life huh?
lucky you. oh well, i accidentally showed it to you the other time and caught it.. so boohoo! haha. i dont want you to leave. seriously.
if i could just turn back time and know you before all this might happen.
haha. i know you are laughing right now coz ive told you bout what im gonna do if i had such supernatural powers huh?
shuttup! haha. hmm.. in you final days, i really hope you remember me all your life. i really am thankful that god gives such treasure to me. to actually know you is good enough for me. and ill keep those promises we had. mama will have such hard time idf you're not around. and no one will play hangman with me like you did. im gonna miss you. im gonna miss you. D;!
Thursday, 11 June 2009
{ 11:41 pm }
today was fun.. was supposed to go jamming today. but haikal turned up late and we had to cancel our plans. so it was me, hirzi and muhaimin. we waited for haikal at lot 1 at 12 till 1 pm.. in the end we just fled off and decide to go cineleisure with li zhe and afik. so they met us at hirzi place. oh yea, hirzi bought the latest game in stored, PROTOTYPE! awesome game man! so yea, when everyone was there, we went off to cineleisure by bus. we played LEFT 4 DEAD versus mode. we were short handed but luckily got some other poeple joined in and we play with them. it was awesome. i love being the infected ones rather than survivors. if you are not familiar with L4D, dun worry bout it. haa. we played for two hours.after that, we went to causeway point. awesome! we play arcade! haha.. and i got free acess to all games coz my brother-in-lar gonna be works there. so he kinda let me play for free.. he's awesome! cant wait for my sis to marry him. all access to arcade like anytime! lol. well, after all that, i we went back home. i reached home about 9.15pm.
im actually feel uncomfortable when im coming back home after 7pm. i dunnoe.. i just dont feel right. maybe because i get headaches everytime. i dunnoe.. hmm. or maybe i dun want my parents to get worried. actually im disturbed by the fact that my parents worries to much.. its alright if they worry, but sometimes they just worry too much and they seems not to be worried but they are. i know. whatever it is, im really greatful to have parents like them. one good thing about my parents is that they are very open-minded. so if you are like in a relationship or anything or having problems, you can approach them.. well mainly approach my mummy coz daddy just will talk crap.. he'll talk crap but in the end it makes sense.. sometimes. lol. i love them!
school holidays are boring aye? to me it is super boring.. like im stranded at home. lol.. but i dont mind really, i can sleep..^^/ hmm. school is fun coz i can meet me friends. i mean hols can meet friends too but not all of them. confirm got some friends who cant make it and make excuses not to go.. like me.. lol.. well i mostly go coz i dont want to dissapoint my friends.. if i cant really go, ill not. hmm..
great friends really are some thing aye? how often do you have great/bestfriends? i mean, i think i have loads or i think i do.. i dunnoe.. there's no one i could really like confirm trust one.. 100% trust.. mostly is ill give maybe 80%-90%. im speaking honestly.. even putri. me and her are like fingers and nails. i can trust her, i always do.. but ill think twice before giving any info or anything uh. speaking of putri, i miss her to the core.. i have no one to talk to sia! lol.. so far for me, i can tell her everything but sometimes, she just dun give the right advise or comments.. but still, i can tell her everything. :D. for guys, hmm.. so far hirzi has been the person i talk to. he's the bomb. lol.. yea.. ok la.. to me, best friends some hardly. so cherish those friends who you might think are capable of taking care of you..that's all i guess.
:/ chow!
Thursday, 4 June 2009
{ 10:51 pm }
Guess what i did today guys? :DDDD! N.O.T.H.I.N.G! awesome right? -_-
i felt like dying man.. i tried to study but i cant study at home.. i wanna go out but everyone's not available.. i tried exercising, well i did some sit ups and skipping but after that, nothing.. i played games.. still, bored to death.. omg, when can this end? i can die from boredom.. school, pls come back! lol.. ok, what am i saying? lol.. oh yea, i accidentaly met my sweetheart just now.. she looks hot.. haha, whatever.. haha jgn marah tau syg.. maybe she's too young for me? lol.. i think she's too young for me.. coz you wanna know why, i cant really be in love with her coz i already love her like me own sister, my best friend.. haha. so yea.. dun have that connection.. we did try to fall in love but we ended up treating one another like siblings more than being couples so we just remain how it was before.. and why am i telling you guys this? lol.. not important la kan? so yea, i love her but not in love with her..btol tk lia? haha..she'll totally agree with me.. i met her near my home, she was some mat reps.. pfft, she said she was bullied by them, but i know they were her friends.. i really dont approve her from befriend them but i cant control everything in her life.. just make sure you dun let them bully you and take advantage of you k lia? :D..3 of my best friends wil/have gone to thier holidays! D;.. im so bored here.. hirzi, haikal and putri.. hirzi and his family took haikal along to their vacation in malaysia! im so jelous.. i wanna go but i confirm you i cant coz my parents will be worried..D: hais.. i wanna join them! i kept imagining us having fun there man! awesome! hais.. maybe nxt time!:D.. ill be waiting for that day when all of my best friend will go on a vacation! it would be awesome! Putri, she'll be going to london for a very long time.. 3 weeks.. its long for me.. ill be missing her like hell.. hmm.. she'll departing this sunday.. and ill be there saying farewell.. i hope she'll have fun and stuff..:D.. have a safe journey ahead!:D
Monday, 1 June 2009
{ 11:08 pm }
i really dont know what or how to start man.. alot have been going through my mind that i just want to let it go but it stuck inside ya know.. hmm.. if its good its ok but it is a negative perspective right now and i just need to let them vanished out from my brain.. i dont know what to do coz it involve too much love, trust and friendship.. why must people make things so difficult when they actually have brains that god have created specifically for us to think what's right and whats wrong? if you already know that the thing is wrong, just stop what ever in the hell you are doing.. as simple as that.. but NO! you wanna make it difficult for yourself.. not only yourself but others that is involve.. seriously oh god, get a grip and get a life la people.. stop making stupid mistakes that are unneccessary in life.. once its ok, twice is still fine but thrice, is just TOTAL BUULLSHHIIITT!!! get it? pls im begging you do a fcking favour for yourself k? stop making other miserable for thier life.. and yours too, i dont get it but if you didnt noticed you are making your own fcuked up life more miserable..so pls, stop whatever you are doing and think for your own.. coz seriously, friends is all you need in life.. im not saying this coz i hate you or anything, im only saying this because i care for you.. you shud know that..phew, got that off my chest.. anwwww, watched "night at the museum 2" just now.. with family.. dad and big sis only wasnt there, the rest went.. awesome movie! quite funny! the storyline much better than the first.. the egypt king was awesome! he make me laugh like hell.. lol.. in total, the show was satisfying! i just want to watch "monsters vs alien" now... jirah said it was good! haha.. i hold it up to her words! it better be coz if not ill go after jirah.. muahaha..
i realise something, only 3 days of school holidays and im bored to death.. no honestly, im seriously bored.. yes i did went out but i dunnoe why but i really feel effing bored! lol..guess i need to go to school.. i realise something about myself too, and im not making this shit up.. i really want to study.. and its for real this time.. no fooling shit! i donnoe, after hearing alot of stories about people's success, i want that.. i want to be successful.. make my family proud especially mummy coz she has high hopes for me..you know, im the eldest son in this family and i shud be the breadwinner of the family soon.. so in order to support my family, i really want to study hard.. but one thing is really getting in my way! and that is my MOOD! i always hated it.. my actions follows my mood.. ill study if only i feel like studying.. no shittin.. i dunnoe, its just me.. whatever i do.. whatever im saying, it really depends on my mood.. and my mood are always bad habits.. like lazyness, distractions and some things like that.. i dunnoe uh, i really need to step up the game man.. i already failed 2 subjects in all.. to be precise, i failed 3 subjects but what brought me up was my test.. now i know test is really important! like duhhh!!! i never know test was important coz what my teacher used to told me was that test is to show your understanding for that chapter.. i didnt know that it meant so much more.. thanks eh teacher.. i wont say who the teacher is coz i dont wanna ruin his reputation..; and job.. haha.. oh well, i think that's that..ill post more if i feel like it..:D peace and thank you! good night!
